Friday, November 02, 2007

TV Quarterly Report: The NWOW Fall Preview

Well now that the 2007 baseball season has come to an end it is time for the TV Season to begin! Before we get to the NWOW Fall Preview of 14 shows to watch this season, a couple of things from the past few days...

I take back everything nice I said about Scott Boras last week when I praised his attempts to get baseball to refocus on the World Series. He tossed that goodwill out the window as the Red Sox were getting ready for the knockout punch Sunday night when he announced that his client Alex Rodriguez would not take his option to return to The Yankees. Boras did apologize for upstaging the World Series, but the damage was done. And why do the Yankee fans attack ARod after his spectacular 2007 MVP season? ARod wants as much as he can get.... anyone else would do the same thing. Yet the Yankees are being cheapskates by refusing to negotiate with him as a Free Agent since it means that The Texas Rangers won't be picking up the bill for part of ARod's salary. It's going to be a long next few years in the post ARod era as the Yankees will now be looking up to Red Sox Nation which is now a far superior team.

In 1997 I finished 3rd in my fantasy baseball league and thanks to the terrific '97 seasons of my Dodger trio of Raul Mondesi, Todd Zeile and Eric Karros, I plunked down my winnings for my very large for 1997 27 inch TV! Now 10 years later thanks to the draft day psychic predictions of Pumpstradamus, my 2nd place winnings went to a 42 inch HD TV which looks fantastic! The quality is remarkable, yet I was surprised to see how odd Fox's Jeannie Zelasko looks close-up.. but on the other hand, Carol Ann Ridell on Channel 4? Homina Homina Homina!!

Therefore because of the new TV. we are temporarily coming to you from my laptop on the coffee table instead of the usual spot at the Bunkey room. In case you missed why we call it that, in our old condo, my office was in the monkey room which had a bizarre pattern of wall paper of monkeys doing strange things. Here at our house, the prior owners left the bunk bed behind in the spare bedroom that is my office.. which is why we call it The Bunkey Room!

Anyway, now that I have this new TV, what are the 14 shows worth watching on it this season? I find that I am watching no shows on Thursdays, Fridays or Saturdays! Thursday has some good stuff.. it just seems that I have been out somewhere or watching baseball over the last several Thursdays. But, Sunday through Wednesday is quite action packed!

1. The Family Guy and 2 American Dad - One producer - 2 hysterical cartoons.... but what happens if American Dad lasts longer than Family Guy? Will they start using flashbacks on American Dad too? Every week these 2 shows hit a home run... the crazy AD where the daughter poses nude, and her brother unknowingly buys a painting of her? Amazing,... And I am ready for The Family Guy Star Wars spoof to work its way into the 1130 Cartoon Network reruns so I can actually remember more of the hysterics from that incredible episode.

3. Desperate Housewives - Relegated to next day viewing on due to the Fox competition. The show just isnt that good anymore... yet oddly I watch it. What's the scoop with the new neighbor kid who can't remember her past? And isn't it odd that her mom, a new member of the block would be so freaking annoying to her neighbors?

4. Curb Your Enthusiasm - The perfect antidote for Seinfeld withdrawal. The show is hysterical and the ad libs give it an odd dialogue pattern that you just dont see in your typical unnaturally written sitcoms. Susie Essman is so funny when she is so nasty to Larry... Last week's episode where she threw Larry under the bus when he got caught using the "n" word while quoting someone else was priceless. And Funkhouser is another great character!! Bob Einstein aka Super Dave Osborne is probably one of the funniest people on Earth! Great cast, hysterical show.

5. Tell Me You Love Me - I catch the west coast HBO feed at midnight and like DH.. i have no idea why I watch this show. Except for the older woman whose husband won't sleep with her, I can't stand these characters. The one woman who was obssessed with getting pregnant (Penny from Lost) took so many pregnancy tests, I'm amazed that one human being could pish so much. I think most of us are hanging on to see if Ally Walker is gonna get neckid! I think couples should watch this show together because once you see how wacked out these characters are, you appreciate your spouse even more!

6. Big Bang Theory - As you might have read here before, Trophy Wife is a distant relative of Sheldon Leonard who was in "It's A Wonderful Life" and produced "The Dick Van Dyke Show". As a salute to him, the main characters in this show are named Sheldon and Leonard! They hang out with 2 other geeks including one guy who has the most bizarre haircut (Simon Helberg who once did a pilot for a show called "The Funkhausers") and mingle with a hot blonde who lives on the same floor as their apartment building. I think the scenario could get a little stale, and it's time for these guys to use their science expertise and get jobs with CSI. Then, the trekkies can have debates with David Caruso about whether he or William Shatner is a worse actor!

7. Heroes - Jump the Shark or Time Travel to the 1600s? Whats the difference? The show has slid considerably but 2 weeks ago it started showing signs of rebounding. It looks like our heroes need something to do... The storyline with the girl in New Orleans looks promising, but this whole Hiro storyline is absurd and now he is madly in love with this woman from the 17th century.... The only way they can salvage this story is if Hiro has sex with her and gives her a venereal disease that wasn't around in the 1600's.

8. Journeyman - I think this may be one the best 2 new shows of the season. The guy has to travel back in time to solve other people's trsuris... its kind of like Quantum Leap with a little more style. The premise is quirky... our main character's time traveling guide is his late wife (!) which ticks off the current wife... who was once engaged to her husband's brother! Its actually a pretty cool show.. maybe he can zip back to 1600 and bring Hiro back and save his high rated lead in on NBC before 24 comes back in January!

9. Law and Order SVU - Consistently intense... it keeps chugging along with great stories and an easy paycheck for Richard Belzer who gets one or two wisecracks per episode.. kind of like the guy in "Airplane" who grabbed the newspaper and proclaimed.. "There's a sale at Mays!" Regular Law and Order has yet to return in the post Fred Thompson era and Criminal Intent has moved to USA, although I never know when it is on.

10. The Singing Bee - I want Trophy Wife to go on this show since she knows the words to every song ever written. Then she can win a million dollars!

11. Deal or No Deal - I just love watching people lose. It's much simpler than the heart stopping Press Your Luck when a whammy could appear at any time... Here its just amusing to see people not understand the law of averages and not have the brains to quit when they're ahead.

12. Kitchen Nightmares - This is another choice for best new show of the season! Chef Gordon Ramsey shows up at a slumping restaurant and whips it back into shape. It's interesting to see some of these people who own restaurants who just sit on their laurels and count their shekels and just dont give a crap about quality. One restaurant owner in particular who was in a popular tourist area let his restaurant rot away knowing full well that he would never get repeat business, but the constant flow of new tourists would keep his pockets full. This show has the excitement that The Apprentice needs. Who cringes more when Gordon puts a bullseye on some hapless restaurant employee and gets him fired at the end of the show? I'm surprised those fired employees sign release forms allowing them to be shown on TV - How does that not ruin their chances of ever getting a new job in the industry? And they showed the kitchen in one of Gordon's restaurants... it was so incredibly spotless you could eat off the floor!! This guy is obsessed with cleanliness to Felix Unger-ian proportions.

13. Phenomenon - I thought this would be a show for Pumpstradamus... but its really an American Idol for magicians who use mind games to do their tricks. It's kind of entertaining and the live element provides plenty of drama. The guy who made his heart stop was pretty creepy, but some of the other tricks are older than the hills.

14. CSI NY - I havent been watching the other CSIs this season, but I like the NY show. Some of the storylines this season have been on other shows.. The avatar storyline was done on Law and Order SVU; and this past week's episode of the injection that caused a person to appear dead while very much alive, but frozen like a rock was the same story mechanism that got rid of the much maligned Nikki and Paolo on Lost last season... Ausellio in TV Guide recently amusingly nicknamed those annoying Heroes twins Nikki and Paolo.

NEXT WEEK - The Big Bloggiversary!

PUMPSTRADAMUS PICK OF THE WEEK; Last week Pumpie tasted his first loss, as the Broncos were inches away from a big Monday Night Win. Nonetheless, the Pack won dropping Pumpies record to a still impressive 7-1. This week we go to New England in honor of the Red Sox World Series win. The Patriots are 5 point road favorites over the Colts... this must be the first time that a 7-0 home team is an underdog. This week Pumpie channels the ghost of Nipsey Russel with this nugget....

"Last week I chose the Broncos
I was crowned the king of dolts.
This week, I shall redeem myself
and back the team of Colts!"

UNBIASED GIANTS FAN PICKS OF THE WEEK: Last week we went 1-2 to drop to 11-12-1. That late Dolphin TD kept us from our first 0-3 week. The Giants have a bye this week.

PHILADELPHIA 3 doggies over Dallas - This sets up an epic battle for next week's Giant game!

Broncos 3 doggies over DETROIT - You think the Bronco and Rockies fans have recovered from last week? Detroit is currently battling the Giants for a wild card slot and they are due for a loss.

JETS 3 1/2 doggies over Washington - What's the difference between The Jets and The Yankees? The Jets will get a 2nd half contribution from Clemens. This game is sandwiched between The New York City Marathon and the 6pm Knick home opener - creating a very long day for Al Trautwig! Speaking of the Knicks, Let's hope Al Sharpton keeps his word and is out there protesting against Isiah Thomas as fervently as he fought to get Imus fired from his radio show. There is no reason that Thomas, a phony failure has not been disciplined for being found guilty in court for sexually harrassing and subsequently firing a female coworker. NBA Commissioner David Stern is right when he criticizes the way the Dolans run that organization. The Knicks are a disgrace, and the horrible things that Thomas has been convicted of doing to this poor woman is far worse and purposefully more damaging than what Imus said about the Rutgers women. Let's hope the door to the Garden slams shut on Isiah as Imus triumphantly returns to the ABC studio directly across the street from MSG!

Last week we introduced you to Nate Kizerian and his odd rendition of Hava Nagila. Continuing the Hava Nagila theme... here is a version of that classic song that is incredibly bizarre!!

No comments: