Well here we are 2 games into the World Series between Boston and Colorado, and all anyone wants to talk about is... The Yankees?
Even though all of baseball's attention should be focused on the World Series, it seems like the Yankees have been grabbing all the headlines. Back on Labor Day when the Yankees looked assured of a playoff spot after overcoming their 21-29 start, who would have thought that Giants coach Tom Coughlin would have more job security than Joe Torre?? By the way, with the Giants in London on Sunday, wouldnt it be cool to hop on a plane late Saturday Night.. fly in for the game, and then fly home right after? It would be as wacky as Jimmy Kimmel flying back and forth from NY to LA every day this week to host 2 talk shows. Actually. don't pilots and stewardesses do this every day??
When it comes to stuff in Yankeeland, I'm a Met fan who doesn't hate the Yankees - just dislikes them... but i do enjoy watching them get eliminated. In 2000, I couldnt stand them after they beat the Mets in The World Series, but after deriving extreme enjoyment after that loss in '01 against Arizona, I get less enjoyment from their annual eliminations. But now,... it should be all about the Rockies and Red Sox with the Yankees managerial search should be on the back burner. Scott Boras had the right idea about refocusing attention on the World Series with his proposal about holding the 1st 2 World Series games at a neutral site and making a whole big showcase out of it like the Super Bowl. That big baseball weekend would also include the Post Season Awards for MVP, Cy Young and Rookie of the Year. Heck they oughta give Kevin Youkilis an award for replacing Sean Green as "Best Jewish Baseball Player!".
Something Joe Torre said in his press conference last week caught my attention... referring to Ian O'Connor's exclusive Bergen Record interview with George Steinbrenner as being "planted". George's media appearances have been few and far between and it seems quite obvious that he has done what a lot of people his age do - he got old. Heck, even the little teeny boppers think of Dick Clark as an old guy who had a stroke. But now that George has become "Old George", his relatives want to shield him from the media so we all remember him as Blustery George, as he was immortalized in last summer's excellent ESPN miniseries "The Bronx Is Burning". I guess they don't want him to turn out like Bob Hope who occasionally made public appearances in his later years although he was starting to look like a man in his late 90s.
And it is all about the image.. Next year's World Series will end just days before the 2008 Presidential Election.. I hope Rudy recovers by then for his comment that he plans to root for the hated Red Sox against the Rockies. One of my Republican coworkers keeps insisting that it is going to be Rudy Giuliani against Hillary Clinton. First of all, there is no way a pro choice candidate will be on top of the ticket run by those religious right wing wackos. No way Jose. Once Rudy is asked if he would nominate a pro choice Judge to the Supreme Court, the GOP will Christie Whitman him to the back burner! And the Democrats - for me it's all about the hair which is why my one year in advance prediction is that it will be John Edwards running against Mitt Romney... or maybe Fred Thompson.. whoever is more conservative for the nutjobs running the GOP. Romney and Thompson are both morons and I haven't really paid enough attention to see who is the bigger idiot that will leave the GOPers all gaga at their convention next year. But if you go all the way back to JFK, image has been a major player on the Presidential ticket. Look at the big deal they made when Nixon shvitzed during his debate with Kennedy. And JFK had awesome hair. Back in the mid 70's that Israel hater Jimmy Carter had fantastic hair - then there was Ronald Reagan. a Republican with excellent hair.. and Bill Clinton had great hair too. And maybe that is why Edwards is spending so much on haircuts.
I agree with Torre that this whole Steinbrenner newspaper interview was somewhat staged. George's family wanted him to go out on top, and they know his condition allows him a few good days every once in awhile. Why not play the media on a "Good George Day"? Here is a chance for him to kvetch about Torre, and then while everyone is complaining about the silly Torre contract offer... the reality is Torre was really fired, and probably unfairly, but the Yankees gave Joe a chance to look like the good guy at their expense....it was all a decoy. Because while all the callers on WFAN are blasting the Yankees, the team quietly slipped in an announcement about the new team power structure that subtly slips George into the background as somewhat of an owner emeritus.
O'Connor phoned in Mike and the Mad Dog last week and flatly denied that he was set up by the Yankees. But how was it possible that he would just happen to call George's room and get through? Can anyone just call a hotel and get George on the phone? Highly unlikely... but the team did what it had to do... created a red herring, And George got to go out on his terms.. He got blasted for how he treated Torre.. but then again that is the way he was back in the old days when he used to fire every other one of his managers and show everyone that he is "The Boss"..
And now we can all focus on what the sports world should be paying attention to.... the amazing fact that Pumpsterdamus has gotten all of his football picks right!! In reality instead of Torre.. gimme some Torrealba.. and I dont want to hear about Mattingly.... I wanna hear more about Manny!
Enjoy the Series!
PUMPSTRADAMUS NFL PICK OF THE WEEK; The Incredible streak continues ... last week Pumpy picked the Bills upset to improve to an unbelievable 7-0. This week in honor of the Colorado Rockies, we go to Denver for the Broncos Monday Night tilt against Green Bay. Denver is favored by 3. Sayeth the Pump: "I have a bad cold that I predict will turn into Bronchitis.. therefore in honor of my bronchitis.. I take the Broncos! And for the election, I say it will be Hillary against Romney"
UNBIASED GIANTS FAN PICKS OF THE WEEK: For the 3rd straight week we went 2-1 to even things out at 10-10-1.
Miami 9 1/2 point doggies over The Giants in London - I know a guy whose daughter married a guy last year, and since the weddding he hasn't gotten a haircut. What does he have in common with The Giants? Both are having a good year without a Barber! This is a tough call - a game at a neutral site against a winless team with fans yelling at vendors for tea and crimpets..and checking the soccer scores on their cell phones. I think The Giants will win, but Miami will cover.
Washington 16 point doggies to NEW ENGLAND - Another toughie with a huge spread. I think Washington will cover.
VIKINGS 1 point doggies over The Eagles - Listeners of my podcast know I criticized Minnesota's governor this week. However, I will be rooting for their team this week.
CLIP OF THE WEEK..
Earlier this season, I mentioned that I named my fantasy baseball team Havana Gila because I drafted 2 Cubans. Here is another Nate K - Nate Kizerian with his recording of Hava Nagila.. and no... that is NOT me.. By the way, that Nate K is Armenian...(His name ends in "ian") Wonder how he felt about Turkey downplaying its horrible genocide into what The Daily Show called a Half a Caust..
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Friday, October 19, 2007
Sean Connery's Goldfinger - A Movie Club Column
Back in the summer, my buddy Steve and I decided that as the local 007 expert he would provide me with the movie list and the videos for the James Bond movie series for The Movie Club. Little did I know that the movies would be on - gasp - videotape and not dvd! Well at least this one was.. maybe the other ones will be on DVD... I'm willing to be surprised. Interestingly enough, the last movie I saw on antiquated videotape was the movie Sean Connery made right after Goldfinger - the Alfred Hitchcock clunker "Marnie"... a movie that takes place in Baltimore about a cute thief who attracts Connery's lustful attention. The "Marnie" shooting schedule affected the Goldfinger shoot since certain scenes couldnt be reshot on location due to Connery's commitment to Hitchcock.... which means he went from being the stud James Bond to a one woman man for Marnie!
Here is the movie's trailer...
Goldfinger was the first Bond movie to be televised... premiering on my 7th birthday as a matter of fact. This past summer it was re-released in London. Goldfinger is the 3rd movie in the series and was a "Steve Pick" because the consensus seems to agree that this is the film where the Bond series hits its stride. I really can't comment one way or another since I didn't see the other Connery Bond movies, and I am kind of bummed that this will be the only Connery Bond movie I will review for the Movie Club since I have always been a big Connery fan.. but then again I also like Roger Moore.
Goldfinger is a Gold smuggling bad guy that Bond first meets at a Miami Beach resort where he is supposed to keep an eye on him. Goldfinger is running some type of little scam where he is ripping off another guy at a high stakes poolside card game. It turns out, Goldie has a hot babe stationed on a balcony who is talking to him through an earpiece while her binoculars are trained at his opponent's cards. That reminds me of my favorite "Cheers" episode where Harry Anderson is in a poker game, and the gang tries to cheat while having Coach send a signal that he is scratching his nose.. prompting Coach to repeatedly point out that he just scratched his nose. Harry was trying to win back the money for Coach from another guy who was conning him, but Harry lost.... Afterwards Coach told them he scratched his nose not as a signal... but because it itched. By the way, "Cheers" should put out a DVD of all the Harry Anderson episodes... that would be a big seller!
As it turns out, Bond can't control himself when he sees Goldfinger's spy.. It marks the first time that we hear the introduction "Bond, James Bond", and young 30something Bond just can't keep his raging hormones under control as he attempts to hook up with the hot little chickie. Later on, he meets her sister who accidentally shoots at him.. it turns out she is trying to shoot Goldfinger, but she just has incredibly lousy aim.
Bond's ultimate mission isn't really made clear till late in the movie. The actual plot involves a crazy scheme by Goldfinger to make the gold at Fort Knox radioactive, so his own gold collection will shoot up in value. Bond finds out about this while he is kept prisoner, and during a temporary escape from his jail cell at Goldfinger's horse farm, he manages to sneak under the floor where Goldfinger makes his presentation to a bunch of mobsters that explains how his plot will unfold. Bond actually pokes his head through a model of Fort Knox... I guess they didn't have Power Point back then! Nonetheless, the presentation did include a map that looked like Google Earth, and Bond's souped up Aston Martin had elements of GPS and Lojack - quite impressive for a movie that was shot in 1964.
Even though Goldfinger's plot really doesn't unfold till late in the movie, it sure is a lot of fun getting to that point. Bond is supposed to be the best Secret Agent, but he is so freaking horny that you can see where Austin Powers got the whole shag obsession! His obsession with hot babes always gets the best of him and he is a bit of a bumbling fool at times... he always knows that he could get called back and replaced by Agent 008. Ultimately, all of Bond's cronies look buffoonish - almost reminds you of a 60s version of "Police Squad"
A beautiful woman named Honor Blackman portrays one of his pursuits - the interestingly named Pussy Galore. Can you imagine how her parents must have felt? They name their daughter "Honor" and then have to tell all their friends she is an actress playing a character named Pussy! Then again we have 2 Republican "leaders" named Bush and Dick. Interestingly enough, in the book, Pussy is a lesbian, but in the movie it is just implied, although that doesn't stop Bond from trying to put the shmaneuver on her. Ms. Galore is a pilot and at one point flies our hero to Baltimore... Was that so Sean could get to that day's shooting on the set of Hitchcock's "Marnie"? Ultimately, Bond finds himself in a position where he can sell Ms. Galore on the idea that Goldfinger is a bad guy, while also trying to get some hoochy mcscoochy too.
The movie is pretty entertaining, and Bond finds himself getting into trouble too often because he can't control his libido. He also comes face to face with Goldfinger's silent henchman Oddjob, which by the way used to be a good store to get cheap stuff. Oddjob walks around wearing a derby that he can throw like a frisbee and turns into a deadly weapon, apparently sharper than an axe. There are also some hysterical lines - A lot of people say the exchange (shown in the trailer) between Bond and Goldfinger during a Batman-esque cliffhanger scene that produced THE line in the movie where Bond asks Goldie "Do You Expect Me to talk?" to which he retorts..."No Mr. Bond, I expect you to die!" My personal favorite is Bond enjoying the moments after another sexual conquest, hears a radio newscaster proclaim "The President said that he was entirely satisfied....." Bond shuts off the radio and announces "That makes two of us". While off canoodling with one of his babes, one of his male colleagues calls his hotel room about a missed dinner they had planned... to which the wisecracking Bond retorted - "Oh something big came up!".. Was Milton Berle supposed to be 007?
I must admit the hoochy mcscoochy scenes are a tad risque for 1964, the action is implied... usually not so subtly by some of Bond's wisecracks. These sex scenes are not to be confused with that new HBO show "Tell Me You Love Me', where last week's no doubt about it porno scene between the wacky woman whose engagement broke off and some new guy she hooked up with. I dont know the characters names, but almost every woman on that show is n-v-t-s nuts.. except for Ally Walker's character. (Thanks to Alan Sepinwall's blog, I just realized that the actress playing the wacky woman trying to conceive is Penny from Lost!) There is no way those 2 actors in that scene did not have some type of sexual contact in last week's episode. They were both naked and close enough to each other, and there had to be some kind of hocus mcpocus going on, unless the guy had some kind of acrobatic Stretch Armstrong Gumby-esque shmeckle that he was able to twist away from her....
The movie is actually loaded with memorable lines, and the action is quite entertaining. The story line moves along at a rather quick pace, and what would be an otherwise boring golf scene is quite entertaining... Who says you need a Bob Barker fight to get an entertaining golf scene?
I was not a big fan of the Goldfinger theme song, however the tune sans lyrics is quite catchy... although it is hard to listen to a movie soundtrack after seeing The Family Guy's Star Wars spoof. Interestingly enough, I am writing a new song, and the Goldfinger song solved a big puzzle of rhyming the word "mister" when they rhymed it with...."kissed her"... The movie has held up well over the last 40+ years, and Sean Connery does a fantastic job, and boy was he young!! On a scale of one to four bladders, meaning how less likely you would be to leave in the middle to go to the bathroom... Goldfinger gets 3 and a half bladders.
Next movie on tap: On Her Majesty's Secret Service
PUMPSTRADAMUS NFL PICK OF THE WEEK - Incredibly, Pumpie whose picks are based on voices in his head has amassed a rather remarkable 6-0 record to start the season! Last week he hit the Browns.. this week we go to Baltimore, home of Pussy Galore's Flying Circus.. where the Ravens are 3 point road favorites over Buffalo. Sayeth the Pump: I need some dollar bills in my pocket, so I will take the Bills!"
UNBIASED GIANTS FAN PICKS OF THE WEEK - Last we went 2-1 for the 2nd straight week to get to 8-9-1. This week we shoot to go over .500....
The Bears 6 point doggies over PHILADELPHIA - Speaking of doggies.. doesn't Ellen Degeneres realize there are legal ramifications to giving dogs to families with young kids? Da Bears continue to recover!
Minnesota 9 1/2 point doggies to DALLAS - Big spread for a team that might be saying goodbye to first place in a few weeks.
GIANTS 9 point faves to San Fran - That is a big spread too... but the Giant defense has looked terrific, and it looks like Eli Manning is starting to live up to his genetic blueprint.
CLIP OF THE WEEK - This is from a Philiadelphia TV station - seems kind of appropriate considering this week's column. This is what happens when a naive innocent young woman gets a high profile TV job...
Here is the movie's trailer...
Goldfinger was the first Bond movie to be televised... premiering on my 7th birthday as a matter of fact. This past summer it was re-released in London. Goldfinger is the 3rd movie in the series and was a "Steve Pick" because the consensus seems to agree that this is the film where the Bond series hits its stride. I really can't comment one way or another since I didn't see the other Connery Bond movies, and I am kind of bummed that this will be the only Connery Bond movie I will review for the Movie Club since I have always been a big Connery fan.. but then again I also like Roger Moore.
Goldfinger is a Gold smuggling bad guy that Bond first meets at a Miami Beach resort where he is supposed to keep an eye on him. Goldfinger is running some type of little scam where he is ripping off another guy at a high stakes poolside card game. It turns out, Goldie has a hot babe stationed on a balcony who is talking to him through an earpiece while her binoculars are trained at his opponent's cards. That reminds me of my favorite "Cheers" episode where Harry Anderson is in a poker game, and the gang tries to cheat while having Coach send a signal that he is scratching his nose.. prompting Coach to repeatedly point out that he just scratched his nose. Harry was trying to win back the money for Coach from another guy who was conning him, but Harry lost.... Afterwards Coach told them he scratched his nose not as a signal... but because it itched. By the way, "Cheers" should put out a DVD of all the Harry Anderson episodes... that would be a big seller!
As it turns out, Bond can't control himself when he sees Goldfinger's spy.. It marks the first time that we hear the introduction "Bond, James Bond", and young 30something Bond just can't keep his raging hormones under control as he attempts to hook up with the hot little chickie. Later on, he meets her sister who accidentally shoots at him.. it turns out she is trying to shoot Goldfinger, but she just has incredibly lousy aim.
Bond's ultimate mission isn't really made clear till late in the movie. The actual plot involves a crazy scheme by Goldfinger to make the gold at Fort Knox radioactive, so his own gold collection will shoot up in value. Bond finds out about this while he is kept prisoner, and during a temporary escape from his jail cell at Goldfinger's horse farm, he manages to sneak under the floor where Goldfinger makes his presentation to a bunch of mobsters that explains how his plot will unfold. Bond actually pokes his head through a model of Fort Knox... I guess they didn't have Power Point back then! Nonetheless, the presentation did include a map that looked like Google Earth, and Bond's souped up Aston Martin had elements of GPS and Lojack - quite impressive for a movie that was shot in 1964.
Even though Goldfinger's plot really doesn't unfold till late in the movie, it sure is a lot of fun getting to that point. Bond is supposed to be the best Secret Agent, but he is so freaking horny that you can see where Austin Powers got the whole shag obsession! His obsession with hot babes always gets the best of him and he is a bit of a bumbling fool at times... he always knows that he could get called back and replaced by Agent 008. Ultimately, all of Bond's cronies look buffoonish - almost reminds you of a 60s version of "Police Squad"
A beautiful woman named Honor Blackman portrays one of his pursuits - the interestingly named Pussy Galore. Can you imagine how her parents must have felt? They name their daughter "Honor" and then have to tell all their friends she is an actress playing a character named Pussy! Then again we have 2 Republican "leaders" named Bush and Dick. Interestingly enough, in the book, Pussy is a lesbian, but in the movie it is just implied, although that doesn't stop Bond from trying to put the shmaneuver on her. Ms. Galore is a pilot and at one point flies our hero to Baltimore... Was that so Sean could get to that day's shooting on the set of Hitchcock's "Marnie"? Ultimately, Bond finds himself in a position where he can sell Ms. Galore on the idea that Goldfinger is a bad guy, while also trying to get some hoochy mcscoochy too.
The movie is pretty entertaining, and Bond finds himself getting into trouble too often because he can't control his libido. He also comes face to face with Goldfinger's silent henchman Oddjob, which by the way used to be a good store to get cheap stuff. Oddjob walks around wearing a derby that he can throw like a frisbee and turns into a deadly weapon, apparently sharper than an axe. There are also some hysterical lines - A lot of people say the exchange (shown in the trailer) between Bond and Goldfinger during a Batman-esque cliffhanger scene that produced THE line in the movie where Bond asks Goldie "Do You Expect Me to talk?" to which he retorts..."No Mr. Bond, I expect you to die!" My personal favorite is Bond enjoying the moments after another sexual conquest, hears a radio newscaster proclaim "The President said that he was entirely satisfied....." Bond shuts off the radio and announces "That makes two of us". While off canoodling with one of his babes, one of his male colleagues calls his hotel room about a missed dinner they had planned... to which the wisecracking Bond retorted - "Oh something big came up!".. Was Milton Berle supposed to be 007?
I must admit the hoochy mcscoochy scenes are a tad risque for 1964, the action is implied... usually not so subtly by some of Bond's wisecracks. These sex scenes are not to be confused with that new HBO show "Tell Me You Love Me', where last week's no doubt about it porno scene between the wacky woman whose engagement broke off and some new guy she hooked up with. I dont know the characters names, but almost every woman on that show is n-v-t-s nuts.. except for Ally Walker's character. (Thanks to Alan Sepinwall's blog, I just realized that the actress playing the wacky woman trying to conceive is Penny from Lost!) There is no way those 2 actors in that scene did not have some type of sexual contact in last week's episode. They were both naked and close enough to each other, and there had to be some kind of hocus mcpocus going on, unless the guy had some kind of acrobatic Stretch Armstrong Gumby-esque shmeckle that he was able to twist away from her....
The movie is actually loaded with memorable lines, and the action is quite entertaining. The story line moves along at a rather quick pace, and what would be an otherwise boring golf scene is quite entertaining... Who says you need a Bob Barker fight to get an entertaining golf scene?
I was not a big fan of the Goldfinger theme song, however the tune sans lyrics is quite catchy... although it is hard to listen to a movie soundtrack after seeing The Family Guy's Star Wars spoof. Interestingly enough, I am writing a new song, and the Goldfinger song solved a big puzzle of rhyming the word "mister" when they rhymed it with...."kissed her"... The movie has held up well over the last 40+ years, and Sean Connery does a fantastic job, and boy was he young!! On a scale of one to four bladders, meaning how less likely you would be to leave in the middle to go to the bathroom... Goldfinger gets 3 and a half bladders.
Next movie on tap: On Her Majesty's Secret Service
PUMPSTRADAMUS NFL PICK OF THE WEEK - Incredibly, Pumpie whose picks are based on voices in his head has amassed a rather remarkable 6-0 record to start the season! Last week he hit the Browns.. this week we go to Baltimore, home of Pussy Galore's Flying Circus.. where the Ravens are 3 point road favorites over Buffalo. Sayeth the Pump: I need some dollar bills in my pocket, so I will take the Bills!"
UNBIASED GIANTS FAN PICKS OF THE WEEK - Last we went 2-1 for the 2nd straight week to get to 8-9-1. This week we shoot to go over .500....
The Bears 6 point doggies over PHILADELPHIA - Speaking of doggies.. doesn't Ellen Degeneres realize there are legal ramifications to giving dogs to families with young kids? Da Bears continue to recover!
Minnesota 9 1/2 point doggies to DALLAS - Big spread for a team that might be saying goodbye to first place in a few weeks.
GIANTS 9 point faves to San Fran - That is a big spread too... but the Giant defense has looked terrific, and it looks like Eli Manning is starting to live up to his genetic blueprint.
CLIP OF THE WEEK - This is from a Philiadelphia TV station - seems kind of appropriate considering this week's column. This is what happens when a naive innocent young woman gets a high profile TV job...
Friday, October 12, 2007
Fun and Games in Cleveland
Doesn't it seem like all the action seems to be going on in Cleveland??
CLEVELAND VS BOSTON IN THE ALCS
The American League portion of the League Championship Series starts this weekend as the Indians take on the Boston Red Sox. If you read last week's column you will recall that I picked the Indians to win it all. Even back in March I had the Indians going to the World Series against the Mets.. but that ain't happenin'. Met fans who hate the Yankees were also quite pleased to see that the Indians knocked the Bombers out of the playoffs Monday Night. And, if you are a Yankee and Cowboy hater you almost had 10 minutes of sports nirvana on Monday Night when the Cowboys looked to be on the road to defeat. However, their miracle last minute win against Buffalo kept it from being the perfect sports night!
Cleveland showed how good they are when they beat out the much hyped Detroit Tigers for the AL Central Crown. Speaking of Detroit... kudos to the prison guards who are reponsible for "Suicide Watch". By now you heard about that despicable Assistant US Attorney who was busted for trying to arrange a sexual tryst with a five year old girl whose mom he met on the internet, but instead found his little sexcapade was part of a police sting operation. John Atchinson's first suicide attempt didn't work out too well but as they say, if at first you don't succeed.... Prison guards on Suicide Watch weren't able to stop his 2nd attempt and now not only is this child molestor dead.. but our taxpayer money won't have to pay for this child molestor's prison stint.. Good job by the guards! Keep it up fellas! I wonder if the failure of the suicide watch guards actually is an issue when they come up for their annual review?
This brings me to an idea for a reality TV Show. They could do the Chris Hanson Dateline NBC Pedophile Busts with a twist. Do the stings live.. and keep a hangman's rope on the set,.... Then, once Chris does his post "you're busted sleazebag" interview, the Pedophile can walk out to the waiting police... or just hang himself. The twist is you bring out a game show set with bells and whistles like Deal or No Deal and players can place bets... sort of like OTB on whether the pedophile will walk out to the Police or just hang himself right there on live TV. The ratings would be astronomical!!
CLEVELAND'S PRIDE AND JOY STARTS A NEW JOB ON MONDAY
Bob Barker out... Drew Carey in... Time for the cats and dogs to stop worrying at 11:57 every morning now that Bob won't be telling us to spay and neuter them... Drew won't say it too... will he?? I still think Dave Price would have been a better choice... a good game show needs a good straight man to play to the strengths of the game's contestants.. Drew was a great straight man on Whose Line is it Anyway, but he belongs on a Match Game remake where he can play it straight to professional funny people. Shows like TPIR need someone vanilla like Pat Sajak to move the show along by turning the spotlight on the player instead of themselves... Do you remember the pre-Letterman CBS Sajak late night bore fest??
And Drew has those glasses... He may have started the trend picked up by Claire's dad on Heroes who always has those horn rimmed glasses. Speaking of which, there's something I noticed about Heroes that I MUST mention!! Claire can quickly regenerate... she cuts off a toe and it immediately grows back. SO what happens when she goes for a bikini wax?? Don't you think this is something Mohinder should be investigating?
LISA NO MOORE REVISITED
Two weeks ago, we did a column about the Funky Winkerbean death storyline of young Clevelander Lisa Moore. Now that the character has been killed off, I have ended my boycott... but I still read (and post comments on) the incredibly well done Stuck Funky blog. The death of Ms. Moore coincides with the release of cartoonists Tom Batiuk new collection of Lisa related strips. They are part of a new book where ALL proceeds go to a cancer charity. I recommend all the NWOW readers pick up a copy. The book is called "Lisa's Story - The Other Shoe" by Tom Batiuk. I am going to try to catch Batiuk at his live appearance next week in Clifton, NJ at the Barnes and Noble. If I get to meet him I will nicely inform him that death doesn't belong in the comics... there's too much of it in real life.
Many of you might have heard that my old college chum Hoss passed away this week after an illness, although I spoke to him last Thursday and he was feeling great and we made plans for next weekend. It's like the old joke, How do you make God laugh? Tell him your plans for tomorrow. The death of Lisa the ink drawn fictional character pales in comparison to losing a buddy. I met him 20 years ago in college, and he had this habit of calling everybody Hoss; ultimately we turned the tables and started calling him Hoss. He is the only person who has ever posted a comment on my Mortgage Podcast and following along the lines of his humor poked fun at me for the spare time I must have to do that podcast. He used to tell the craziest jokes with Bob Hope wit... What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef... and he had a Dennis Miller-esque way of using analogies - That girl's teeth are so buck she could eat corn through a picket fence. I have found myself laughing out loud quite a bit the last few days thinking back about some of those wacky Hoss shenanigans... I mentioned him in the April Home Sweet Home column when he was hanging out at my old Roselle house and my Mom brought us a big bowl of grapes, he turned to her and announced "Hey Mrs. Kean.... I need to send these back...I prefer to have my grapes peeled for me" They never had another conversation after that that my mother didn't sarcastically say... "Hey Hoss.. want some grapes peeled?"
One very funny Hoss incident - one time we were at a party during college, and a friend of ours got just too ridiculously drunk. He sat outside,.. a bit of a puke-a-phobe, just minutes away from losing it but trying not to go through the unpleasantness of a drunken hurl. Hoss went up to him, put his arm on his shoulder, ostensibly to offer comfort to him, but instead took a different tactic asked him... "Hey... did you ever bite into a chunk of butter"... My buddy turned a deeper shade of green and begged him not to continue.. "Hey did you ever eat mayonaise straight?"....
After that point, I always knew who to call if I ever needed to induce vomiting.. and that other buddy was too terrified to ever have another drink in Hoss's presence!
NEXT WEEK --- The Goldfinger column!!
PUMPSTRADAMUS PICK OF THE WEEK
Well, we have a bit of controversy. As you might recall, last week Pumpie picked the Jets,.... however when I originally asked for his prediction, he told me the voice in his head tells him to take the Giants because they are the "home team" and he had just been at Giants Stadium for the Genesis Concert. However, I pointed out that the Jets play at Giants Stadium too... which confused Pumpy causing him to think he misunderstood his "psychic voice", kind of like a Three's Company episode. Well, it turns out the psychic voice was based on the home team "for the week" which was the Giants, and since I may have inadvertantly influenced his opinion... the editorial board here at NWOW has decided to award him a W for the pick to improve his record to 5-0.
This week, we go to Cleveland for the Browns Dolphins game. The Browns are favored by 4 1/2 points. Sayeth the Pump: "Since Drew 'Carey' is from Cleveland and since I 'carried' the Torah last week on Simchat Torah.... we gotta go with Cleveland!!"
UNBIASED GIANTS FAN PICKS OF THE WEEK - Last week we had our first winning week going 2-1 for a year to date record of 6-8-1.
Giants 3 1/2 point faves over ATLANTA - This one makes me nervous because of home dogs on Monday Nights... but the post dog killer Vick era Falcons have played pretty poorly this season. I wouldn't be surprised if they cover, but I'm taking the Giants anyway!
New England 5 1/2 faves of DALLAS - That lucky win against Buffalo last week showed us something that the 5-0 Cowboys are home doggies to The Mighty Patriots. Perfect week for the Giants to close the deficit to 1 game heading towards that November 11 showdown.
JETS 3 point doggies to Philadelphia - This game means more to the Jets; if they lose they might edit that "Mangenius" line when the release the Sopranos DVD! The Eagles can lose and still compete for the wild card in the mediocre NFC.
CLIP OF THE WEEK...
Here is a clip I found on You Tube via Buzzer Blog from Drew Carey on The Price is Right.
CLEVELAND VS BOSTON IN THE ALCS
The American League portion of the League Championship Series starts this weekend as the Indians take on the Boston Red Sox. If you read last week's column you will recall that I picked the Indians to win it all. Even back in March I had the Indians going to the World Series against the Mets.. but that ain't happenin'. Met fans who hate the Yankees were also quite pleased to see that the Indians knocked the Bombers out of the playoffs Monday Night. And, if you are a Yankee and Cowboy hater you almost had 10 minutes of sports nirvana on Monday Night when the Cowboys looked to be on the road to defeat. However, their miracle last minute win against Buffalo kept it from being the perfect sports night!
Cleveland showed how good they are when they beat out the much hyped Detroit Tigers for the AL Central Crown. Speaking of Detroit... kudos to the prison guards who are reponsible for "Suicide Watch". By now you heard about that despicable Assistant US Attorney who was busted for trying to arrange a sexual tryst with a five year old girl whose mom he met on the internet, but instead found his little sexcapade was part of a police sting operation. John Atchinson's first suicide attempt didn't work out too well but as they say, if at first you don't succeed.... Prison guards on Suicide Watch weren't able to stop his 2nd attempt and now not only is this child molestor dead.. but our taxpayer money won't have to pay for this child molestor's prison stint.. Good job by the guards! Keep it up fellas! I wonder if the failure of the suicide watch guards actually is an issue when they come up for their annual review?
This brings me to an idea for a reality TV Show. They could do the Chris Hanson Dateline NBC Pedophile Busts with a twist. Do the stings live.. and keep a hangman's rope on the set,.... Then, once Chris does his post "you're busted sleazebag" interview, the Pedophile can walk out to the waiting police... or just hang himself. The twist is you bring out a game show set with bells and whistles like Deal or No Deal and players can place bets... sort of like OTB on whether the pedophile will walk out to the Police or just hang himself right there on live TV. The ratings would be astronomical!!
CLEVELAND'S PRIDE AND JOY STARTS A NEW JOB ON MONDAY
Bob Barker out... Drew Carey in... Time for the cats and dogs to stop worrying at 11:57 every morning now that Bob won't be telling us to spay and neuter them... Drew won't say it too... will he?? I still think Dave Price would have been a better choice... a good game show needs a good straight man to play to the strengths of the game's contestants.. Drew was a great straight man on Whose Line is it Anyway, but he belongs on a Match Game remake where he can play it straight to professional funny people. Shows like TPIR need someone vanilla like Pat Sajak to move the show along by turning the spotlight on the player instead of themselves... Do you remember the pre-Letterman CBS Sajak late night bore fest??
And Drew has those glasses... He may have started the trend picked up by Claire's dad on Heroes who always has those horn rimmed glasses. Speaking of which, there's something I noticed about Heroes that I MUST mention!! Claire can quickly regenerate... she cuts off a toe and it immediately grows back. SO what happens when she goes for a bikini wax?? Don't you think this is something Mohinder should be investigating?
LISA NO MOORE REVISITED
Two weeks ago, we did a column about the Funky Winkerbean death storyline of young Clevelander Lisa Moore. Now that the character has been killed off, I have ended my boycott... but I still read (and post comments on) the incredibly well done Stuck Funky blog. The death of Ms. Moore coincides with the release of cartoonists Tom Batiuk new collection of Lisa related strips. They are part of a new book where ALL proceeds go to a cancer charity. I recommend all the NWOW readers pick up a copy. The book is called "Lisa's Story - The Other Shoe" by Tom Batiuk. I am going to try to catch Batiuk at his live appearance next week in Clifton, NJ at the Barnes and Noble. If I get to meet him I will nicely inform him that death doesn't belong in the comics... there's too much of it in real life.
Many of you might have heard that my old college chum Hoss passed away this week after an illness, although I spoke to him last Thursday and he was feeling great and we made plans for next weekend. It's like the old joke, How do you make God laugh? Tell him your plans for tomorrow. The death of Lisa the ink drawn fictional character pales in comparison to losing a buddy. I met him 20 years ago in college, and he had this habit of calling everybody Hoss; ultimately we turned the tables and started calling him Hoss. He is the only person who has ever posted a comment on my Mortgage Podcast and following along the lines of his humor poked fun at me for the spare time I must have to do that podcast. He used to tell the craziest jokes with Bob Hope wit... What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef... and he had a Dennis Miller-esque way of using analogies - That girl's teeth are so buck she could eat corn through a picket fence. I have found myself laughing out loud quite a bit the last few days thinking back about some of those wacky Hoss shenanigans... I mentioned him in the April Home Sweet Home column when he was hanging out at my old Roselle house and my Mom brought us a big bowl of grapes, he turned to her and announced "Hey Mrs. Kean.... I need to send these back...I prefer to have my grapes peeled for me" They never had another conversation after that that my mother didn't sarcastically say... "Hey Hoss.. want some grapes peeled?"
One very funny Hoss incident - one time we were at a party during college, and a friend of ours got just too ridiculously drunk. He sat outside,.. a bit of a puke-a-phobe, just minutes away from losing it but trying not to go through the unpleasantness of a drunken hurl. Hoss went up to him, put his arm on his shoulder, ostensibly to offer comfort to him, but instead took a different tactic asked him... "Hey... did you ever bite into a chunk of butter"... My buddy turned a deeper shade of green and begged him not to continue.. "Hey did you ever eat mayonaise straight?"....
After that point, I always knew who to call if I ever needed to induce vomiting.. and that other buddy was too terrified to ever have another drink in Hoss's presence!
NEXT WEEK --- The Goldfinger column!!
PUMPSTRADAMUS PICK OF THE WEEK
Well, we have a bit of controversy. As you might recall, last week Pumpie picked the Jets,.... however when I originally asked for his prediction, he told me the voice in his head tells him to take the Giants because they are the "home team" and he had just been at Giants Stadium for the Genesis Concert. However, I pointed out that the Jets play at Giants Stadium too... which confused Pumpy causing him to think he misunderstood his "psychic voice", kind of like a Three's Company episode. Well, it turns out the psychic voice was based on the home team "for the week" which was the Giants, and since I may have inadvertantly influenced his opinion... the editorial board here at NWOW has decided to award him a W for the pick to improve his record to 5-0.
This week, we go to Cleveland for the Browns Dolphins game. The Browns are favored by 4 1/2 points. Sayeth the Pump: "Since Drew 'Carey' is from Cleveland and since I 'carried' the Torah last week on Simchat Torah.... we gotta go with Cleveland!!"
UNBIASED GIANTS FAN PICKS OF THE WEEK - Last week we had our first winning week going 2-1 for a year to date record of 6-8-1.
Giants 3 1/2 point faves over ATLANTA - This one makes me nervous because of home dogs on Monday Nights... but the post dog killer Vick era Falcons have played pretty poorly this season. I wouldn't be surprised if they cover, but I'm taking the Giants anyway!
New England 5 1/2 faves of DALLAS - That lucky win against Buffalo last week showed us something that the 5-0 Cowboys are home doggies to The Mighty Patriots. Perfect week for the Giants to close the deficit to 1 game heading towards that November 11 showdown.
JETS 3 point doggies to Philadelphia - This game means more to the Jets; if they lose they might edit that "Mangenius" line when the release the Sopranos DVD! The Eagles can lose and still compete for the wild card in the mediocre NFC.
CLIP OF THE WEEK...
Here is a clip I found on You Tube via Buzzer Blog from Drew Carey on The Price is Right.
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
Baseball 4Q: How Not to Gwynn the Wild Card
Well folks, the 2008 Mets are undefeated at 0-0.
Actually, instead of ranting and raving about this Met disaster.... my perspective is to learn from prior mistakes. Here is my take: The 2006 Mets went all the way to Game 7 of the National League Championship Series after GM Omar Minaya had spent the prior off season trying to strengthen the bullpen. Therefore, there was really no reason to shake the pen up for the '07 season... yet that is what the team did. They made it a focal point to re-sign Guilermo Mota despite his early season steroid suspension. Yet they decided to part with Heath Bell, Chad Bradford and Darren Oliver. This season, Bell went 6-4 with a 2.08 ERA for the Padres, Bradford was 4-3 with a 3.54 ERA for Baltimore, and Oliver was 3-1 with a 3.66 ERA for the Angels. Yet, the Mets thought it was a good idea to make a trade for a KC Royal named Ambrox Burgos. Burgos is out till mid 2008 after he had midseason surgery and despite a 1.10 WHIP in 23 innings he couldn't maintain a steady job with the big league bullpen. Yet the Mets thought that Burgos would make the team better so they traded away young Brian Bannister for him, and Bannister went 12-9 with an ERA under 4 despite the fact that he gave up 11 earned runs in his last 5 2/3 innings. Don't you think the Mets would have been better off keeping that '06 bullpen somewhat intact - and not acquiring Burgos? Heck, having Bannister around would have come in handy when Orlando Hernandez got injured in August,... And let's not minimize the loss of El Duque...aside from a few klunkers, he pitched very well this season. Of course blowing that 7 game lead, losing those last 7 games to the Phillies, and giving up those 7 runs in the first inning, didn't help this '07 team.
Who woulda thunk that that Funky Winkerbean's Lisa Moore character (whose inappropriately intense suffering in the comics was blasted in this blog last week) would last longer than the '07 Mets? Readers of last weeks column are probably aware that the character is on her way out the door. Thanks to a link I found on the Stuck Funky blog, I found out her time will be coming on Thursday. This poses an intereseting question for my Jewish friends. Thursday is the Jewish Holiday of Shemini Atzeret where we go to the synagogue and say a Prayer for the Sick and later in the services, the Yizkor - Prayer for the Dead. What prayer do you say for Lisa? What happens if you go to services before you read the paper? I always try to read Pearls Before Swine before I leave in the morning, and it's right under Funky... what happens if I accidentally see it? And in the Wednesday strip her subconscious was starting to be led away by a man in a suit wearing a facemask...who is the angel who leads comic strip characters to Heaven? Charles Schulz?? And I hope her husband can afford their daughter's health insurance. Our wonderful President Bush just vetoed a Congressional bill that would provide more money for children's health care. I guess that horrible man needs to spend more money on an Iraq war that is helping his preserve his oh so precious oil money!
What a crazy end to the 2007 Regular Season... The Padres were a strike away from icing a playoff spot in the same season that local legend Tony Gwynn was inducted to The Hall of Fame.. yet it was his son Tony Jr. who came up for the Brewers and got the hit that forced the Pods into a crazy marathon extra inning one game playoff against the ridiculously hot Colorado Rockies.
Last year at the conclusion of the '06 Regular Season, we did a column questioning why baseball doesn't delay the start of the playoffs in case a team has to play a tie breaker. Had the Mets not choked, there could have been a 4 way wild card and division tie that would have forced the Rockies to play another game in another city after the Monday Night marathon. Baseball listened because the playoff schedule has been tinkered with... Game 7 of the Wold Series is scheduled for November 1. I don't have much else to quibble with with MLB other than the Mets, plus I am a bit baseball-ed out after 6 grueling months of managing my fantasy team. I finished 2nd - (and I was kind of hoping Brad Hawpe would have come up in that 13th inning so he could hit his 30th homer and give me six 30 home run hitters) and now that baseball fantasy season is over, it's time to spend quality time with Trophy Wife! Wait till she finds out I signed up for an NHL Fantasy League!
Looking back at our preseason picks, I actually picked the Phillies to win the East and the D-Backs in the West. As for the Mets, I didnt think they had enough in the tank... (see the March 25 column) Check out this Pumpstradamus-esque sentence about the Mets from that column,....
"The team will get a big pickup as Glavine gets closer to the magical 300 win mark - but they will not cruise to the NL East as they did in 2006."
Boy is that an understatement!
I picked the D-backs for the wrong reason... I thought Randy Johnson would have an impact - he really didn't and I still haven't quite figured out how they won that division.. Eric Byrnes hit 21 homers and drove in 50 bases.., while rookie Chris Young narrowly missed a 30-30 season hitting 32 homers and stealing 27 bases. My other 2 playoff picks from the NL were the Mets as the Wild Card and the Astros in the mediocre Central. I did pick the Cubs as my surprise team of 2007 and I was quite surprised how lousy the Astros turned out in '07.
In The American League I picked 3 of the 4 playoff teams in March.. the only team I missed was the Sox.. I picked the Chi Sox instead..another team whose horrible play was very startling.. What the heck happened to Jose Contreras? I still can't figure out why a team with this much talent did so poorly,. Is it the manager?? I was so high on them and the Indians that I thought the Wild Card just had to come out of this division.. And the Indians didn't disappoint.. even though Cliff Lee had a horrendous year, young Fausto Carmona came out and turned in a fantastic season. CC Sabathia and Carmona will be getting a lot of attention when they give The Yankees fits during the first round. More on that later in this column...
In the August 24th column, I announced my post season award predictions.. its impossible to predict that in the beginning of the year...... and I gotta tell you, I am writing this in the 13th inning of the Monday Night game and if Matt Holliday doesnt get the MVP, I'll be a monkey's uncle. David Wright came awfully close though. The AL MVP pick remains the same... Not only does ARod win in a landslide...but he also had enough time to impregnate his wife!! Will anybody else even get a vote? For Cy Young, I took Jake Peavy in the NL... that seems to be the most logical pick, but my AL pick was Seattle stopper JJ Putz. The Mariners faded, so it looks like it might be Sabathia instead. For Rookie of the Year - Ryan Braun in the NL, and it looks like my August pick of Dice-K will be replaced by his teammate Dustin Pedroia.
.
In the original April column, I picked the Mets over the Phils in the NLCS>.... that is not gonna happen obviously... But I did pick the Indians over the Angels in the ALCS.. My Mets over Indians pick won't happen but will Cleveland make it in my Post Season Mulligan Picks column??
Here are my picks for the post season.
The Rockies are sending the Phillies home... that weak pitching staff has no chance against the Rocky hitters. Colorado's hitters are almost as good as The Yankees.
The Cubs over the D-Backs.. I'm not too impressed with the D-Backs after Brandon Webb
I see The Rockies knocking off the Cubbies to go to the World Series. Wouldnt it be funny if the Rockies fly in Steve Bartman for the game and give him free tickets and a free glove with a seat in the front row?
Over in the AL.. I wasn't so sure about the Angels beating the Red Sox, but after his great outing Saturday, it looks like Kelvim Escobar is ok and not injured and he and John Lackey and Jered Weaver form an incredible Top 3. So I take the Angels to knock off the Bosox.
I am also picking Cleveland over the Yankees.. although the Indians might have to balance Sabathia and Carmona the way the '01 Diamondbacks pitched Randy Johnson and Curt Schilling. I have been throwing the '01 World Series at all the Yankee fans who have been picking on me this week about The Mets! And for those Yankee fans salivating over stopper Joe Borowski (who drove me bonkers on my rotis team especially with those 2 blown saves against Seattle last week!!)... I think he will be on a short leash with Bettencourt one blown Borowski save away from taking over.
I'm sticking with The Indians to win the Pennant for an incredibly exciting Indian-Rocky World Series.. with a lot of nail biting Borowski 9th innings!! Although Matt Holliday batting against him sort of reminds me of of Joe Carter batting against Mitch Williams in the early 90s. This look likes it's going to be one fun post season!! My prediction is...
Cleveland is going to lose Lisa Moore... but they are gaining a World Series Crown!!!
PUMPSTRADAMUS PICK OF THE WEEK: Amazingly and incredibly Pumpstradamus is 4-0 this season... This week we go to NY, home of my beloved Mets for the battle between The Giants and The Jets. Pumpy originally wanted to pick The Giants because they play at Giants Stadium where he had seen a Phil Collins concert the week before... but when informed that the Jets played there too, he requested a mulligan. The Giants are 3 point favorites... Sayeth the Pump: "Since I picked the Jets over the Sharks in West Side Story, I pick the Jets over the Giants"
UNBIASED GIANTS FAN PICK OF THE WEEK - Last week we were 1-2.. Year to date: 4-7-1
GIANTS 3 point faves over The Jets - The Giants, of course!
Detroit 3 1/2 doggies to WASHINGTON - Take the Lions... aside from the Eagles game, they have looked quite good this season... 34 points in the 4th quarter last week? Wow!!
BILLS 10 doggies to Dallas - That home dogs on Monday Night didn't work out too well last week, did it? The Cowboys better lose soon before we start thinking about Wild Card Races!
CLIP OF THE WEEK: Here is something uplifting for my fellow Met fans!
Actually, instead of ranting and raving about this Met disaster.... my perspective is to learn from prior mistakes. Here is my take: The 2006 Mets went all the way to Game 7 of the National League Championship Series after GM Omar Minaya had spent the prior off season trying to strengthen the bullpen. Therefore, there was really no reason to shake the pen up for the '07 season... yet that is what the team did. They made it a focal point to re-sign Guilermo Mota despite his early season steroid suspension. Yet they decided to part with Heath Bell, Chad Bradford and Darren Oliver. This season, Bell went 6-4 with a 2.08 ERA for the Padres, Bradford was 4-3 with a 3.54 ERA for Baltimore, and Oliver was 3-1 with a 3.66 ERA for the Angels. Yet, the Mets thought it was a good idea to make a trade for a KC Royal named Ambrox Burgos. Burgos is out till mid 2008 after he had midseason surgery and despite a 1.10 WHIP in 23 innings he couldn't maintain a steady job with the big league bullpen. Yet the Mets thought that Burgos would make the team better so they traded away young Brian Bannister for him, and Bannister went 12-9 with an ERA under 4 despite the fact that he gave up 11 earned runs in his last 5 2/3 innings. Don't you think the Mets would have been better off keeping that '06 bullpen somewhat intact - and not acquiring Burgos? Heck, having Bannister around would have come in handy when Orlando Hernandez got injured in August,... And let's not minimize the loss of El Duque...aside from a few klunkers, he pitched very well this season. Of course blowing that 7 game lead, losing those last 7 games to the Phillies, and giving up those 7 runs in the first inning, didn't help this '07 team.
Who woulda thunk that that Funky Winkerbean's Lisa Moore character (whose inappropriately intense suffering in the comics was blasted in this blog last week) would last longer than the '07 Mets? Readers of last weeks column are probably aware that the character is on her way out the door. Thanks to a link I found on the Stuck Funky blog, I found out her time will be coming on Thursday. This poses an intereseting question for my Jewish friends. Thursday is the Jewish Holiday of Shemini Atzeret where we go to the synagogue and say a Prayer for the Sick and later in the services, the Yizkor - Prayer for the Dead. What prayer do you say for Lisa? What happens if you go to services before you read the paper? I always try to read Pearls Before Swine before I leave in the morning, and it's right under Funky... what happens if I accidentally see it? And in the Wednesday strip her subconscious was starting to be led away by a man in a suit wearing a facemask...who is the angel who leads comic strip characters to Heaven? Charles Schulz?? And I hope her husband can afford their daughter's health insurance. Our wonderful President Bush just vetoed a Congressional bill that would provide more money for children's health care. I guess that horrible man needs to spend more money on an Iraq war that is helping his preserve his oh so precious oil money!
What a crazy end to the 2007 Regular Season... The Padres were a strike away from icing a playoff spot in the same season that local legend Tony Gwynn was inducted to The Hall of Fame.. yet it was his son Tony Jr. who came up for the Brewers and got the hit that forced the Pods into a crazy marathon extra inning one game playoff against the ridiculously hot Colorado Rockies.
Last year at the conclusion of the '06 Regular Season, we did a column questioning why baseball doesn't delay the start of the playoffs in case a team has to play a tie breaker. Had the Mets not choked, there could have been a 4 way wild card and division tie that would have forced the Rockies to play another game in another city after the Monday Night marathon. Baseball listened because the playoff schedule has been tinkered with... Game 7 of the Wold Series is scheduled for November 1. I don't have much else to quibble with with MLB other than the Mets, plus I am a bit baseball-ed out after 6 grueling months of managing my fantasy team. I finished 2nd - (and I was kind of hoping Brad Hawpe would have come up in that 13th inning so he could hit his 30th homer and give me six 30 home run hitters) and now that baseball fantasy season is over, it's time to spend quality time with Trophy Wife! Wait till she finds out I signed up for an NHL Fantasy League!
Looking back at our preseason picks, I actually picked the Phillies to win the East and the D-Backs in the West. As for the Mets, I didnt think they had enough in the tank... (see the March 25 column) Check out this Pumpstradamus-esque sentence about the Mets from that column,....
"The team will get a big pickup as Glavine gets closer to the magical 300 win mark - but they will not cruise to the NL East as they did in 2006."
Boy is that an understatement!
I picked the D-backs for the wrong reason... I thought Randy Johnson would have an impact - he really didn't and I still haven't quite figured out how they won that division.. Eric Byrnes hit 21 homers and drove in 50 bases.., while rookie Chris Young narrowly missed a 30-30 season hitting 32 homers and stealing 27 bases. My other 2 playoff picks from the NL were the Mets as the Wild Card and the Astros in the mediocre Central. I did pick the Cubs as my surprise team of 2007 and I was quite surprised how lousy the Astros turned out in '07.
In The American League I picked 3 of the 4 playoff teams in March.. the only team I missed was the Sox.. I picked the Chi Sox instead..another team whose horrible play was very startling.. What the heck happened to Jose Contreras? I still can't figure out why a team with this much talent did so poorly,. Is it the manager?? I was so high on them and the Indians that I thought the Wild Card just had to come out of this division.. And the Indians didn't disappoint.. even though Cliff Lee had a horrendous year, young Fausto Carmona came out and turned in a fantastic season. CC Sabathia and Carmona will be getting a lot of attention when they give The Yankees fits during the first round. More on that later in this column...
In the August 24th column, I announced my post season award predictions.. its impossible to predict that in the beginning of the year...... and I gotta tell you, I am writing this in the 13th inning of the Monday Night game and if Matt Holliday doesnt get the MVP, I'll be a monkey's uncle. David Wright came awfully close though. The AL MVP pick remains the same... Not only does ARod win in a landslide...but he also had enough time to impregnate his wife!! Will anybody else even get a vote? For Cy Young, I took Jake Peavy in the NL... that seems to be the most logical pick, but my AL pick was Seattle stopper JJ Putz. The Mariners faded, so it looks like it might be Sabathia instead. For Rookie of the Year - Ryan Braun in the NL, and it looks like my August pick of Dice-K will be replaced by his teammate Dustin Pedroia.
.
In the original April column, I picked the Mets over the Phils in the NLCS>.... that is not gonna happen obviously... But I did pick the Indians over the Angels in the ALCS.. My Mets over Indians pick won't happen but will Cleveland make it in my Post Season Mulligan Picks column??
Here are my picks for the post season.
The Rockies are sending the Phillies home... that weak pitching staff has no chance against the Rocky hitters. Colorado's hitters are almost as good as The Yankees.
The Cubs over the D-Backs.. I'm not too impressed with the D-Backs after Brandon Webb
I see The Rockies knocking off the Cubbies to go to the World Series. Wouldnt it be funny if the Rockies fly in Steve Bartman for the game and give him free tickets and a free glove with a seat in the front row?
Over in the AL.. I wasn't so sure about the Angels beating the Red Sox, but after his great outing Saturday, it looks like Kelvim Escobar is ok and not injured and he and John Lackey and Jered Weaver form an incredible Top 3. So I take the Angels to knock off the Bosox.
I am also picking Cleveland over the Yankees.. although the Indians might have to balance Sabathia and Carmona the way the '01 Diamondbacks pitched Randy Johnson and Curt Schilling. I have been throwing the '01 World Series at all the Yankee fans who have been picking on me this week about The Mets! And for those Yankee fans salivating over stopper Joe Borowski (who drove me bonkers on my rotis team especially with those 2 blown saves against Seattle last week!!)... I think he will be on a short leash with Bettencourt one blown Borowski save away from taking over.
I'm sticking with The Indians to win the Pennant for an incredibly exciting Indian-Rocky World Series.. with a lot of nail biting Borowski 9th innings!! Although Matt Holliday batting against him sort of reminds me of of Joe Carter batting against Mitch Williams in the early 90s. This look likes it's going to be one fun post season!! My prediction is...
Cleveland is going to lose Lisa Moore... but they are gaining a World Series Crown!!!
PUMPSTRADAMUS PICK OF THE WEEK: Amazingly and incredibly Pumpstradamus is 4-0 this season... This week we go to NY, home of my beloved Mets for the battle between The Giants and The Jets. Pumpy originally wanted to pick The Giants because they play at Giants Stadium where he had seen a Phil Collins concert the week before... but when informed that the Jets played there too, he requested a mulligan. The Giants are 3 point favorites... Sayeth the Pump: "Since I picked the Jets over the Sharks in West Side Story, I pick the Jets over the Giants"
UNBIASED GIANTS FAN PICK OF THE WEEK - Last week we were 1-2.. Year to date: 4-7-1
GIANTS 3 point faves over The Jets - The Giants, of course!
Detroit 3 1/2 doggies to WASHINGTON - Take the Lions... aside from the Eagles game, they have looked quite good this season... 34 points in the 4th quarter last week? Wow!!
BILLS 10 doggies to Dallas - That home dogs on Monday Night didn't work out too well last week, did it? The Cowboys better lose soon before we start thinking about Wild Card Races!
CLIP OF THE WEEK: Here is something uplifting for my fellow Met fans!
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